Northwest Registered Agent Acquires AAEusocial Interweb Technologies
Northwest Registered Agent is pleased to announce that it has acquired Washington-based pre-startup AAEusocial Interweb Technologies, an innovative IT and software collective focused on accessibilizing workplace leisure opportunities. AAEusocial will form Northwest’s new SkiveTime division and leverage its work in self-supervised learning to maximize the number of sinecure appointments available to the company’s veteran team members.
“We are thrilled to be joined by AAEusocial,” said Sina P. Bravo, Northwest’s Senior VP of Acquisitions and the Consolidation of Things. “Paid leisure has always been one of our goals, whether through team outings, company trips, or oversight downgrading. Now, we have the opportunity to achieve, as a company, a near-permanent paid holiday.”
The AAEusocial collective formed from its members’ interest in universal process automation—with the goal of creating software robots to perform their duties with little-to-no supervision.
“We knew that if we pooled our knowledge of expert systems we could make ourselves functionally obsolete,” said one AAEusocial loL-systems analyst who wished to be identified as Monkey Knuckles. “But, we still needed capital and still needed jobs. That meant we needed a governing body that shared our vision.”
As the world’s first Kicking Unicorn company, Northwest believes it is well-positioned to transform AAEusocial’s no-work mission into a company-wide no-work initiative.
“With no debt, investors, or shareholders, we can do business differently at Northwest,” said Odinn Mimir, Senior VP of the PromulGater Platform. “In our view, full-automation doesn’t have to mean full-redundancy. If you manage your bot and your work gets done, it makes little difference if you spend your days at the spa, sleeping in, or hitting the slopes.”
Bucking the Industry Trends
With the acquisition of AAEusocial, Northwest joins a growing trend of acquisitions in the world of corporate filings and registered agent service, ranging from Computershare’s acquisition of Corporate Creations Enterprises to Wolters Kluwer’s acquisition of License Logix to Legal Zoom’s acquisition of Earth Class Mail (additionally, LegalZoom acquired LegalInc in 2018). Northwest believes, however, that its goals differ from those of its competitors.
“This isn’t a Venture Capitalist roll-up play,” said Sandy Narwal, Northwest’s Senior VP of Finance. “The acquisition of AAEusocial won’t decrease competition or limit consumers’ choices, and it won’t generate the confusion that so often arises when a company snaps up its competition but leaves the brands masquerading as independent entities.”
“Right,” added Bravo. “Sure, it was exciting to watch when RASi was bought by Lexitas and became ‘RASi, a Lexitas company’ that then bought Mycompanyworks and Corp2000, that Sacramento outfit with the late 20th-century wave of the future name. But, that’s also the stuff Company X vs. Company Y (where X=Y) blog posts are made on, and we care about bloggers’ mental health.”
What’s next for Northwest’s new SkiveTime division? “We’re building a no-code platform for bot creation,” said Monkey Knuckles, “so our less tech-savvy employees can begin disengaging from their day-to-day activities. This project is in the testing phase, but we’re happy to report that some members of our product management team have already achieved this result.”
About Northwest
Northwest Registered Agent is a family-owned and -operated Corporate Guide Service with 600 employees nationwide and offices in every state. Northwest is famous among literally no one for bootstrapping its way to over 2 million active subscriptions and throwing down twice as many filings as the famous websites every month.
Northwest takes pride in its commitment to Privacy by Default®, which ensures that client data is never sold. That’s doing business the right way.
